What If You REALLY Saw me?

When you see ME, what do you see?

• Am I a THUG?
• Am I a Gangsta?
• Am I a N–a?
• Do you think I am going to rob you?
• Do you think I am going to hurt you?
• Do you think I will be a bad or absent father?
• Are you just plain scared of me?

Because sometimes it seems like how you view me……

• Makes it OK that I got a 1 in 3 chance to be imprisoned
• Makes if OK to justify kneeling on my neck for nine minutes and call it a heart attack
• Makes if OK for me to be murdered in my own apartment and justify it by saying I had some weed with me
• Makes you ignore that I am (by far) the fastest group of people committing suicide
• Makes you say that I need to be “compliant” when that does not always mean I will be safe
• Makes you immune to my suffering (and for some, the belief that I deserve it)

And how do you think that makes me feel?

• Do you think I feel loved?
• Do you think I feel cared for or about?
• Do you think I feel appreciated and respected?
• Do you think I feel like I belong?
• Do you think I feel HUMAN?
• Do you think I feel that anyone cares at ALL about how I feel?

Well……

• Maybe I feel lonely
• Maybe I feel scared
• Maybe I feel like I don’t matter
• Maybe I feel hopeless
• Maybe I feel like crying
• Maybe I feel like giving up
• Maybe I am afraid to love you for fear of not being loved back
• Maybe I am afraid to love you for fear of how it will be received

So maybe this is why

• I appear angry, distant and tense all the time
• I seem to not want to be bothered
• I reject YOU (before you reject me)
• I act like I don’t care
• I pretend love is for weak men and I don’t need it

Maybe I am

• Looking for permission to belong!
• Looking for permission to be human!
• Looking for someone who wants my protection when the world says you need to be protected from me!
• Looking for someone who is a demand to be close to me!
• Looking for someone who believes in me!

You see

• I am NOT always ok
• I am NOT always strong
• I am NOT always brave
• I actually DO care
• I actually DO have feelings
• I actually am totally capable of love

So please STOP

• Downplaying MY humanity to make YOU feel better about YOURS
• Downplaying MY feelings to make YOU feel better about YOURS
• Making ME the villain so that YOU get to feel like you are the HERO
• Making ME, to gain your acceptance, play up your magnificence and expect no acknowledgment of my own

What are YOU afraid of?

• Are you afraid that you (or others) will find me your equal? Will that make you less?
• Are you afraid that you (or others) will find me beautiful? Will that make you less attractive?
• Are you afraid that I may be better at some (or a LOT of) things than you are? Does that make you less worthy?
• Are you afraid that you (and others) seeing me as human diminishes YOUR humanity?
• Are you afraid that WHEN people see that I am worthy of love that they will love you less?

I ask again: When you see me. What do you see?

• Can you see the difference it makes?
• Can you see that how you view me really matters?

Even when the world ignores the best of me and I try to pretend it does not matter to me!

So…I invite you to take another look!

Now: What do you see?

I bet when you look newly, you will find that we are more than what the world says we are and even what YOU think we are.

The fire we bring may appear on the surface to burn and you have been told it is not safe.

But if you get close enough, you will find our fire comforting, protective and warm.

We welcome you to sit next to us by our fire and just be with our humanity AND we can be with yours!